Tuesday, September 01, 2009

WWE Raw Report

Date: 08/31/09 from Detroit, MI.

The Big News: The Shockmaster returned! Oh yes!

Show Analysis:

Dusty Rhodes came out to start the show. He noted that he was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in Detroit and put over the city. Dusty added that he is proud of his son Cody Rhodes. He announced Cody vs. Randy Orton for the title on Raw with Dusty in Cody’s corner and John Cena as referee. That brought out Orton, who said that Dusty is jealous Cody looks up to Orton more than he ever did to Dusty. Orton said Dusty was just shamelessly trying to gain Cody’s love.

Dusty responded that Cody is hungrier than Orton and that he will be there to raise Cody’s hand. Orton asked Dusty why he shouldn’t just have punted Dusty right there. Cody Rhodes came out and said that Dusty is his father and he won’t pass up the opportunity for the title shot. He said that this was strictly business. Orton said that the fix was in, and Dusty admitted as much.

Dusty was good here, but I was expecting him to be more fun. He was actually on the reserved side by Dusty Rhodes standards. No “bull of the woods,” “fruit of my loins,” “mothership,” “funky like a monkey,” “in pulic if you weel,” or anything. He sounded basically like everyone else on the show. That’s yet another argument for giving guys bullet points so they can define their own speaking style rather than having mediocre writers scripting out every word.

Beth Phoenix won a bad 6 woman battle royal to earn a title shot later in the show. Beth Phoenix eliminated Rosa Mendes. Gail Kim dumped Alicia Fox. Beth sent out Kelly Kelly. Jillian Hall and Gail Kim then fought for a while. It was quite bad. They blew a bunch of spots and the crowd turned on the match. Gail finally threw out Jillian, but Beth then immediately dumped Gail for the win.

Chris Jericho beat MVP in a very good match. Jericho hit a back suplex. MVP came back with punches and an overhead belly to belly. He blocked a Walls attempt and hit the yakuza kick for two. Jericho retaliated with a springboard dropkick and bulldog, but MVP regained control with balling. MVP’s playmaker attempt was reversed into a Walls attempt which was reversed into a small package for two. Jericho then hit the code breaker for the pin. Jericho and MVP worked very well together.

Dusty Rhodes and DX were hanging out backstage, plugging the Rise and Fall of WCW DVD. HHH said Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase are disgraces to their fathers’ legacies. Dusty said that when Cody won, he would give HHH or Shawn a title shot.

Hornswoggle beat Chavo Guerrero in a “bullrope match” not actually contested under bullrope match rules. I’m not wasting any more time on this utter shit.

Mark Henry beat Big Show via DQ. This was a bad match, a flashback to 80s WWF with Henry putting Show in a long headlock where the two big guys just stood there. Show hit a spear and Henry hit a splash. Show then undid the turnbuckle and sent Henry into it for the DQ. Show then laid him out with the KO punch. Not that it matters, but they certainly haven’t done a great job making you think Henry and MVP have a prayer against Show and Jericho.

DX and Dusty Rhodes did another backstage vignette. They talked about the Kevin Nash-Hulk Hogan one finger push. HHH said if they were in WCW they wouldn’t have let Nash do that. They argued WWF vs. WCW with Dusty. Dusty pointed out WCW beat WWF when Shawn Michaels was on top and WWF rose up when Michaels left. As Shawn threw a temper tantrum, HHH started making fun of the Johnny B. Badd gimmick. Dusty noted that was his idea.

Kofi Kingston beat Carlito, Jack Swagger and the Miz to retain the Intercontinental Title. This is old news, but boy did they bury Miz again here. He announces his big goal is to win the United States Title. It takes him only two weeks before he already has his shot, along with two other guys who weren’t even on last week’s show and haven’t expressed much of an interest in the title. So the guy’s big career turnaround is going to be winning a title that you can get a shot at in no time at all without accomplishing anything in particular. And then he fails anyway. He’s like a pitcher who announces his big goal for the next season is to keep his ERA under five, and then he gets cut in May with a 12.83 ERA.

In spite of that, this was a fun match. Kofi hit an impressive plancha on all of the heels. He used a frog crossbody off the top onto Carlito and Miz. Swagger hit a series of clotheslines and a Vader bomb on Carlito. He went for one on Miz but hit the knees. Kofi hit a high double leg drop on both Swagger and Carlito. Miz gave Swagger the skull crushing finale but Carlito broke up the pin. Carlito then hit the back stabber on Miz but Kofi hit trouble in paradise for the win.

Mickie James beat Beth Phoenix in a good match by WWE women’s standards. Beth hit a slam into the corner and dropkicked Mickie into the post. She followed with a shoulder breaker. Mickie hit low dropkicks and a huracanrana. Mickie went to the top but Beth pushed her off to the floor and threw her into the barricade. Mickie then hit the tornado DDT for the pin.

HHH and DX were backstage again. HHH made fun of the Shockmaster, at which point the Shockmaster voice came on in the background. Fire went off and Santino stumbled through the wall in the Shockmaster helmet. It was revealed Arn Anderson was doing the voice, and Dusty said the idea could have worked. Only a very small percentage of the audience could have possibly understood this, but I don’t care. I found this laugh-out-loud hilarious and absolutely loved the segment.

John Cena backstage said that he wouldn’t give Cody Rhodes the title and that Rhodes would have to earn it himself. He did a good promo where he repeatedly stated that he would not quit against Randy Orton. It would have been really strong if he hadn’t started with the cutesy crap that makes it clear the whole thing is a joke and not serious business. They announced Bob Barker as guest host of Raw next week. I won’t lie. I love the idea. I hope it turns out well.

The main event wasn’t a match. John Cena, Cody Rhodes, Dusty Rhodes and Randy Orton came out. Dusty reiterated that there isn’t anything he wouldn’t do for his son, and apologized to Cena. Cody and Orton then attacked Cena two on one. DiBiase came out and joined them, and then DX tried to make the save. Dusty cut them off with his boot and they beat down the faces. Then Orton gave Dusty the RKO as a livid Cody looked on.

I like a good swerve but this felt like a Vince Russo swerve for the sake of a swerve. I mean, what kind of pointless plan was this? Dusty sets up a diabolical plan that involves two hours of deception. The big payoff? A two-on-one attack that occurs basically every week. Why not just book a three-on-one handicap match if you want to help your son? Or book the whole thing to be in a cage so nobody could make the save? He lied for two hours to accomplish basically nothing when he could have accomplished his own stated goal better by just being upfront from the beginning.

Final Thoughts:

This show was a mixed bag, which by recent Raw standards is a positive. I liked the Jericho-MVP match a lot and there were some other good matches as well. The DX comedy was pretty funny in general and the Shockmaster vignette was hilarious. Of course, you also had a number of matches that were quite bad, and I thought the main storyline was rather silly.


Blogger hobbyfan said...


I'm going to jump right in here rather than do the usual e-mail response.

If they let Dusty book this show himself, rather than let Gewirtz and his cast of idiots put words in his mouth, this might've come off better. Dusty wasted his time currying favor with Orton, hence the RKO at the end of the show. This was unacceptable. It suggests that Orton has mind control over Legacy, as if he needed anything else to generate heat. The shaved head, BTW, has me thinking he rented "American History X" w/Edward Norton one night too many, eef yew weel.

Yeah, I know. Couldn't resist.

Looked like Mickie might've been legit injured, or it was the greatest sell job of her career. Carlito was more of a tweener, if you noticed the staredown he had with Swagger before Miz & Kofi came out. This after Swag had beaten Primo on Superstars 4 days earlier.

The split singles involving the tag champs felt like they were booked backward. Gewirtz must've overdosed on Japanese manga comics, or had a seizure after Disney purchased Marvel earlier in the day, I don't know, but I'd have put MVP over Jericho and had Show KO Henry clean (which I think has been the case on house shows).

Hunter was right. The DX-Dusty skits came off a little awkward after the DVD shillfest. When "Shockmaster" showed up, it sounded more like Vince doing the voiceover rather than Arn, who was put there just for an obligatory cameo. Dusty using the boot on Hunter later was probably because he didn't like being dissed about Shockmaster and Johnny B. Badd. Cena not wearing the stripes was a dead giveaway that they weren't going to do a main event match. This begged for Vince to come out and decide that since Dusty betrayed his trust, he was making a 6-man tag right then and there (which would've been the dark main anyway). Didn't happen. More stupid writing.

See, what I hated about WCW in its hot period was that every Nitro ended just about the same way several weeks in a row, with the heels in control. You have to have more balance in the booking, and the selfish egos (not named Dusty) refused to allow it. It happens in WWE too often to suit, but not on a weeks-on-end basis.

It's way past time for Orton to lose the title, and maybe Breaking Point is it. Can't wait to see what they'll have Bob Barker do next week. The part of Happy Gilmore will be played by Orton, who's abused guest hosts 2 of the last 3 weeks, which has to stop. E-mail me to rebut.

5:59 AM  
Anonymous mike said...

I was sooooo expecting the Cody Rhodes-Orton match to occur.....with the infamous Dusty finish at the end.

7:52 AM  
Blogger EVE said...

After weeks of RAW drek, I was actually entertained by the show last night. Jericho/MVP, U.S. Title 4-way, and Mickie/Beth matches were very entertaining. The Dusty/DX stuff was mildly amusing and Trips seemed less annoying then usual. My favorite part of the show was after Orton tagged The Dream with the RKO. Great facials by Orton, Cody, and Ted. I actually gave a crap about Cody and I never thought that would happen.

Orton's heel work is second to none right now, dspite all the crap that comes flying his way.

8:03 AM  
Anonymous SteRDLK said...

Raw was really good this week

The US title match was very good, and I dont think it buried Miz as bad as you say, especially as he didnt get pinned. Kofis leap was sensational.

The battle royal wasnt great, with Gail Kim botching again. Jillian isnt that good either, and neither are Kelly Kelly Kelly, Alicia Fox and Rosa Mendes. The actual championship match was a good match, with it looking like Mickie won via a fluke after Beth dominated.

The Jericho vs MVP match was another good match, while Big Show vs Mizarkswoggle wasnt good. The finish was the usual crappy finish of the week, but that spear looked impressive.

The DX-Dusty backstage segments were entertaining, especially as I hate DX, and Im not a big fan of Dusty. The Shockmaster V.2 was hilarious, and Arn Anderson being there was great (if you werent aware, he was the voice of the original Shockmaster)

During the Hornswoggle-Chavito crap, I am sure I heard Cole stop laughing and he just sounded embarrassed to be involved. Maybe if he showed some balls and called it how he saw it, the fans wouldnt despise him as much. Same goes to King.

The end of the show was incredibly well done, and the 2 surprises were extremely well executed, the second twist more so than the first, due to the facials of Orton and Cody. It will be interesting to see what happens between Legacy/DX/Cena next week, especially how Cody and Ted react to Neo-Nazi Randy Orton. He suits being bald.

Overall, a very good episode of Raw, especially when you consider how bad they have been for the majority of the past 5 months.

8:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No I thought Ole Anderson was the original Shockmaster voice.

8:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

EGM3 sys:

I must be in the minority as I didn't find the Shockmaster skit funny at all. The whole DX segment was just once again Vince's way of saying "I WON!" Fine, Vince, we got it. Now get over it!

Loved seeing Dusty doing the boot to HHH's head. Too bad they couldn't have done the bionic elbow conga line, only I'm sure DX and Cena would never have gone for it.

So wanted to see a body slam in the Henry-Show match. First Show slams Henry, and struts, then Henry slams Show with his superior strength. Oh well...

10:50 AM  
Anonymous SteRDLK said...

You're right, it was Ole, I misheard on this video that it was Arn


11:26 AM  
Anonymous Steve Khan said...

Why was there no Dusty-Swagger skit?

2:07 PM  
Anonymous The Masterbater said...

You know, I know this might be nit picking but I hate it when someone comes in for the save and they play their music. It's like ok, I see my friend getting jump let me help him out but let me stop and tell whoever to play my music when I come out so I can do the save. I know in the real world and not the WWE universe is that when someone sees a friend getting jump they don’t stop without hesitation and try to save the person.

12:22 PM  
Anonymous DW said...

Not only is DX not funny any more, they have become annoying. Triple H, with his over-the-top ego and his absolute takeover of the show, and his sniveling buddy HBK have reached new heights of selfishness. They have begun to parody themselves. It appears that they are so self-important that they can mock the characters they play - while they are playing them. It's a display of ego that is unmatched anywhere. Give it up you two - you've never really been that funny to begin with and now you are just a complete waste of time. Give those roles to a couple of 20-somethings and maybe it would work. For two 40-something men, it's embarrassing. Meanwhile, while you two are entertaining yourselves, plenty of talented wrestlers are sitting on their asses wondering why they are being paid.

7:44 PM  
Blogger hobbyfan said...

DX can be funny----provided they write their own material. That first skit with Dusty made me roll my eyes as first HBK, then Dusty, then HHH, froze in place with the DVDs they were shilling. I know Dusty was a ham at the mic, but that doesn't mean our Rover boys don't have to follow.

7:22 AM  
Anonymous hhh said...

You know you guys act like I live in a perfect world. If it was a perfect world for me I would be like a 10 time world champion, a tag champion, intercontinental champ, I would main event in every Wrestlemania, humiliate all my opponents like they were all below me, I would make people thinking I have the most devastating move ever (which is only a pile driver when you think about it and mind you the WWE band it), beat every odds against me stipulation matches such as 5 on 1, 3 on 1 and definitely 2 on 1 matches to make myself look great, I would own this company in the future, make people kiss my ass or all my friends have a successful career in the WWE and have the best ring entrances like having a throne like I am a god or a king when I come down the ring. So you guys need to back off oh wait…………….

7:27 AM  
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8:56 PM  

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