Tuesday, October 10, 2006

""ECW"" Report

Okay, so the women were in a studio, and they cut to them every 20 seconds. They had entire segments to themselves, and they would do split screens in the middle of the matches to show them. This was a complete distraction and made it impossible to concentrate on anything else. They did contrived discussion to plug the Marine, and laughed with dealer Balls Mahoney.

They didn’t actually play poker. Instead, they “played” high card. Well, that was the premise. Basically they just took off clothes to strip down to the same underwear we have seen them in a hundred times before. At the end, Candice and Maria tore off each other’s clothes and rolled around on the floor supposedly nude with their naughty parts blurred out while Balls banged the table and chanted ECW. The entire show was about this “strip poker.” The matches were just backdrop.

CM Punk beat Rene Dupree with knees from the clinch, a high knee, a bulldog, a power slam and the anaconda vise. Tommy Dreamer beat Kevin Thorn. He hit a suplex and sit down power bomb but missed an elbow off the second rope. Thorn hit a sit down power bomb, but Dreamer kicked out. Dreamer hit the DDT for the pin.

Sabu, Rob Van Dam and Sandman beat Big Show, Matt Striker and Test in a good match. Sabu and RVD got the best of Test early. RVD hit a springboard crossbody and spin kick, and Sabu & RVD did the rolling thunder combination. Big Show and Sandman came in, and Show overwhelmed Sandman with strikes. The heels worked over Sabu, until Sabu gave Striker an enzuigiri and tagged RVD. RVD came in with clotheslines, kicks, a monkey flip and a kick off the top on Striker. He went for the five star but Test came in. RVD kicked him and Sabu gave him Air Sabu. Sabu also knocked Show off the apron. RVD hit Striker with the five star in the ring and tagged Sandman. Sandman hit the Rolling Rock for the pin.

Final Thoughts:



Anonymous Anonymous said...

I actually got up a few minutes early today just to read your report, which I figured would be a scathing rant. Instead it seems they have driven you to apathy, which, while understandable, is nowhere near as entertaining. You didn't even do the "please don't go", etc., categories.

I'm very interested to see what kind of rating that abomination gets. I wouldn't be shocked if it got a high train-wreck rating.

Anyway, talk about disrespecting the wrestlers. A guy like CM Punk has to look at what they did to his match during that show and feel like quitting.

I think it was a little more risque than what what we've seen before, with lingering closeups, etc. If Vince wants to get into porn, he should just do it. Although, if he does, maybe he should tell Trinity that flexing her pecs to make her breast implants shift around is more "creepy" than "sexy". But then maybe she was instructed to do that to keep with the sci-fi theme.

Anyway, definitely a night that makes one embarrassed to be a fan. I can't be the only person out there wondering why I bother to watch this crap.


4:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just wondering, everyone says HHH will probably be in charge of the company when Vince steps down, what about Shane? I mean, I would think he would have more of a sense than a selfish HHH would? I don't get why he woudn't leave the company to Shane. Or, does Shane doesn't really want to take over?

7:03 AM  
Anonymous tyson said...

It looks like this was just a stunt to see if pumping up something for two weeks straight, on all their programs, would bump the ecw buy rate.

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I took ECW and WWE off my DVR a couple of weeks ago. I wish others woulddo the same. Your summation is a perfect description.

10:28 AM  

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